Mommy - Blog & Shopping

Where To Toy Shop This Holiday Season?

Written By: Jeanie Chang

Wal-Mart and Target!

According to the Wall Street Journal, Wal-Mart and Target are battling it out to win the dollars of toy-buying parents.  So, if you plan on venturing out in the wee hours on Black Friday to buy toys for your kids, I suggest you hit Wal-Mart and Target first before going to other stores like Toys R 'Us.  The Wall Street Journal says until recently Wal-Mart had priced its toys higher than those advertised by Target, but now Wal-Mart's new toys beat Target's prices by just a few pennies.  Maybe that's not enough to make a difference for you especially if you favor one store over the other.  I personally prefer Target because the customer service is so much better and their aisles are more organized.

But if you're looking for specific toys in particular this season such as a Barbie doll embedded with a video camera for your daughter, it is $39 at Wal-Mart or $6 less than Target.  According to the Wall Street Journal, Target priced Stinky the Garbage Truck, a matchbox truck that tells jokes, at $49.99 after a coupon or $6 less than Wal-Mart.   I would do your research before Black Friday on where to get the best deal on the specific toys you want to purchase for your children!

Here's another good thing about shopping at Wal-Mart and Target this year, both retailers say if you show them an ad featuring a lower price, they will match it!  You can't beat that -  plus it saves you so much time and energy shopping from store to store if you just choose these two to tackle this year for your toy shopping!

The Wall Street Journal does say that Target may have an edge this holiday season because shoppers get an extra 5% discount on all purchases including toys if they pay with a Target credit or debit card or the Target visa card.  If you have one of those, then Target should be your main destination.

Check out the article online at www.msnbc.com.

TARGET COUPONS up to 50% off Christmas Toys and More! Click Here!

A Sweet Korean Mommy Commercial

Looking for one thing, I was led to this video of a young Korean couple just finding out that they were going to have a baby. It appears to be a commercial for a water company in Korea, but the emotions are genuine - a real moment in time captured. Take a look, though I won't offer you my translation, it has a universal understanding.

 

:: Part One::

 

 

:: Part Two::

 

 

:: Behind the Scenes ::

  

 

Shared by: Kathy Choi-Lee

The Halloween Costume Dilemma!

Written By: Jeanie Chang

I don't like buying Halloween costumes because I feel like it's a waste.  Your child will most likely wear the costume just once, right?  Next Halloween, she/he will want to be someone/something else.  Or maybe it's not all a waste especially if you have kids that are the same gender.  My 8 year old son's Halloween costumes have definitely been passed down to his two younger brothers!  They really had no say in what they wanted to be for Halloween because they had to be a frog or a tiger or Buzz Lightyear or Mr. Incredible or a pirate or Prince Caspian.  (Yes, those are my oldest son's Halloween costumes).  My three year old's costume is already picked out and ready to go.  He'll be a tiger this year.   Done.  For my daughter, I always face the dilemma of buying her a Halloween costume every year.  I laugh at myself now remembering how I used to be so extravagant about her Halloween costume when she was little.  Until she was five years old, she had beautiful Disney costumes or she was an angel or a princess.  I find it funny because she didn't really care what she was for Halloween being that young.  Of course now that she's ten years old, she does care what costume she wears for Halloween and now I'm "burned" out of Halloween costume-buying.

I decided to be more creative this year!  Well, it's creative for me anyway.  My daughter couldn't decide what she wanted to be for Halloween so I decided for her.  I had to get her a few staples from Justice (the girls store) this weekend and by the time I was done, I ended up creating her Halloween costume!  Justice had a very small selection of Halloween props and some Halloween-related items such as a miniskirt made from a tulle-like material.  I looked at the pictures of their models by the Halloween section and got to thinking.  My daughter's costume (all from Justice) is a cross between a rock-star, punk girl, Disney star wanna-be.   I put together that hot pink tulle miniskirt, black and hot pink leggings, a shirt with silver sequins (which is part of their fall line), silver sequins gloves (in the Halloween section) and a hot pink bob wig which I also found in the store's Halloween section.  Voila!  That's her costume this year and she actually loved it!

Two Halloween costumes down and two to go.  I needed a costume for my 8 year old and 6 year old sons.  I decided to tackle consignment stores and yard sales first!  There's this really nice, somewhat upscale childrens' consignment store just minutes from my house that I have browsed in a couple times.  I thought maybe I'll be able to find a Halloween costume there for at least one of my boys and save some money in the process too.  I went the other day and twenty minutes later, I came out with two BRAND NEW Halloween costumes with the tags still on and the exact sizes I needed for my sons!  They just happened to be having a sale too and Halloween costumes were 30% off!  So, I purchased two BRAND NEW Halloween costumes for $6.99 each!  What a steal.  I asked about the return policy before I bought the costumes and they told me as long as I returned them by the 14th, it would be fine.  I figured that gave me plenty of time to convince my sons to like the costumes.  My 8 year old son's costume is a skeleton.  I was worried about that actually because I thought maybe it would be too scary for him since he doesn't like to wear scary costumes, but he actually liked it and thought it was cool.  The skeleton costume (brand new like I said) came with a full body suit, a mask, footsies and gloves!  My six year old's costume is the red Bionicle and he LOVES it!  Of course he had to be reminded by his older brother what Bionicle is.  Nevertheless, his costume came with a full body suit and a Bionicle mask.  AWESOME.  Total cost for my sons' new costumes: $13.98.  Total cost for my daughter's new costume: $32.  That's a little costlier than I would like, BUT the silver shirt with sequins, which was the most expensive, is something she can wear to school.  She can also wear the leggings another time as well.  The wig, miniskirt and gloves can be recycled for another costume another year! 

If you too are struggling with the Halloween costume-buying, I highly recommend you look into second-hand stores such as children consignment stores, yard sales, Goodwill or your friends!  A couple of my friends did a 'switcheroo.'  They have boys the same age and they just exchanged costumes which is a great idea!  I may have to do that next year.

Another Kid's 'Trash' Could Be Another Mom's 'Treasure'!

startinganebaybusiness.blogspot.com

Written By: Jeanie Chang

I always dread having to clean out my kids' closets and reorganizing their clothes as the seasons change.  Summer seems to have finally come to an end (I hope I'm not jinxing it!) here in North Carolina with cooler temperatures expected the next ten days according to the ten day weather forecast on The Weather Channel.  So, it means I have to get cracking on putting away the summer clothes, bringing out the fall/winter wear,  figuring out what still fits and what doesn't and what kind of clothes/shoe shopping I need to do!  I don't really go back-to-school shopping for my kids because the weather stays so warm here until mid-October so everyone is still wearing summer clothes until then.

As I was tackling my 8 year old's closet, I started thinking about a clothing swap party I went to several years ago.  I'm sure you've heard of the concept or maybe you've even hosted swap parties or attended them.  A friend of mine hosted the party where we brought clothes from our closets that we no longer wear for one reason or another and we'd swap.  We organized our clothes by placing all the tops in one area, pants in another, jeans, dresses, etc.  Then we started "shopping!"  It was a lot of fun and I came away with four tops, 1 pair of pants and a jacket!  It costed me nothing of course so that made it even more fun!

Wouldn't that be a great idea to do with fellow moms with their kid's old clothes?   If you organized a kids clothing swap party with other moms, you might be able to avoid some needless shopping and save yourself some money by swapping clothes with your friends whose kids have outgrown clothes that could fit one of your kids!   Everyone could benefit and come away with 'new' clothes for their kids.  Of course you can do this with toys and books as well and maybe some of you already have.  If any of you have had a swap party, how did it work for you?

I think I just may get started on a clothing swap party as soon as possible because 1.) I want to get rid of clothes that no longer fit my son (and my other children) and make more room in their closets for new "used" ones. 2.) I'd like to save money and time! 3.) It's an excuse to get together with friends and have fun doing something different!

As I said, you can do any kind of swap party which I think is more fun, less hassle and headache than holding a yard sale to get rid of items or going to a yard sale to purchase items to save money.  This way, you're amongst friends  who have the same goal as you do in getting rid of clothing that no longer fit your kids while at the same time "shopping" for new clothes that could fit them now.  I'm pretty sure if you gather a few of your mom friends together for a kids clothes swap party, you'll all come away with some 'new' clothes for your children.

Can't Live Without My Crackberry, I mean Blackberry!

Written by: Jeanie Chang  Pic via blog.tatango.com

It's so true.  Ever since I got my Blackberry two years ago, I have been hooked to smartphones and have never looked back.  Now that I'm approaching my two year anniversary, I'm due for a FREE Blackberry upgrade and I'm so excited!  It's like I'm winning the lottery or something! I love the fact I can check email instantly and respond immediately as well as receive responses immediately, check my friends' Facebook status, update my own Facebook status, browse the Internet and of course, instant Blackberry message my husband and close friends who also have Blackberrys.  It seriously is ADDICTING.  For me, it is totally a CRACKberry and not BLACKberry. 

My husband has actually gotten frustrated with me on more than one occasion (okay, many times) because I'll be so distracted checking my Blackberry for the most recent email or text.  I have a different tone when I receive an email, a different tone for an instant message, a different tone for a text and different ringers for calls.  Isn't it the best when you hear a specific tone from your Blackberry and know what you're receiving without having to retrieve your phone?

Honestly, the best way to reach me is via instant message, text or email.  I text and instant message so much on my Blackberry that I refuse to switch over to an iPhone.  I don't think I can handle the touch screen because it requires a little more delicate touch with your fingers.  When I text or instant message, my fingers press firmly and at the speed of lightning.  Or so people say.  I'm a master Blackberry texter.  Just ask any of my friends!

Instant messaging or texting is an awesome way of communicating especially for moms.  (This is my opinion)  We're so busy multitasking with our kids around us, we don't have the luxury of talking on the phone because it would be too distracting.  I don't know about you, but I am really distracted when I talk on the phone.  I really try and make an effort NOT to talk on my Blackberry while driving.  I have been known to speed, miss a turn, run a red light, etc.  (sssshhhh)  You can text a message or reply really quickly, abbreviate words, whatever to communicate.  Short and sweet.  All the while keeping a close eye on your kids and being available to speak to them without being rude to the person you're having a conversation with.  BUT, I have to point out the dangers of the CRACKberry...

Do you know the biggest technology story of the year is texting while driving?  The Wall Street Journal says nearly one in 10 tech stories were about this dangerous practice!  (The next biggest story was the launch of the new iPhone).  I will be the first to admit that because of my Blackberry addiction, I have texted while driving.  It's not really texting AND driving, it's more like texting while stopped at a red light or stop sign or driving slowly in my neighborhood...I know, it's horrible!  Many states now have a texting while driving ban and two states are also restricting bus drivers from texting while driving which freaks me out!  My children ride the bus to and from school every day.

My point is, the Blackberry/Crackberry addiction is real.  (I believe there's an iPhone addiction too).  It's a wonderful form of technology which makes life easier for us, but we need to make sure to refrain from Blackberry use when needed.  I'm writing this more as a reminder to myself!

Never Say Never!

Written By: Jeanie Chang

Before you became a mom, did you have a "I'll never do this when I have kids"  list?  I'm sure you have!   We all have our own ideas about what kind of mom we plan on being before we have children.  So many of my friends, before they became moms, would say to me things like "When I have kids, I'll never do that" or "My child will not be like that" or "I'm going to be a very strict and organized mom" - yada yada yada. 

When I encounter moms-to-be now and/or friends who say things like that, I just nod.  I don't want to be condescending or a know-it-all, but you know what I'm thinking.  I'm thinking, "Just you wait because you can't predict how you're going to be as a mom until you become a mom."  Women really do not know what motherhood is like until they become a mother, don't you agree?  Motherhood is so unpredictable.  Just when you're comfortable - BAM - something changes on you!

I read a funny blog the other day from a mom who said she was a better mom BEFORE having kids.  I chuckled at that one because I understood what she meant.  Before we have kids, many of us have those lists of what we plan or don't plan on doing after we have kids.   Some of the things on her list that really cracked me up were:

Never going to bribe my children to be on their best behavior

Never going to lose my cool during a temper tantrum

Never going to feed my children anything less than the healthiest,  most organic, delicious food

Never going to give them a BS answer to any of their questions, no matter how challenging the answer

Are you laughing with me?  Never say never, right?  My kids still believe in the tooth fairy and Santa Claus and I'm giving them BS answers all the time so they'll continue believing.  Sometimes, I'm just too tired to answer their questions so I'll just say, "because mommy said so."   My kids' favorite place to eat?  Chick Fil A.  I have most definitely bribed my kids to be on their best behavior when we have company or we go out to restaurants, shows, etc.  (It does work!)  And I can't count how many times I lost my cool when my 3 year old has a temper tantrum especially over something so trivial like wanting to fix his socks because they're crooked.  (Yes, he's a bit OCD)

My sister is a classic example of saying "I'm never going to...."  She'd see me give my kids lollipops to quiet them down (BRIBE) or raise my voice (not quite a yell) when my kids have a temper tantrum and look a bit disapproving.  Well, things changed when she became a mom.  LOL.  She even said to me and I wanted to record her saying this, "You don't know what motherhood is like until you become one."  I was a mother for almost six years before she had her first child and as she watched me parent my children, I'm sure she was thinking those "I'm never going to do that..."  LOL.

I think that having any kind of 'to do' list that starts with "I'm never going to" or "I'm always going to do" is never a good idea.  It could stress you out and you might be disappointed.  It's like that line from Forrest Gump.  "Life is like a box of chocolates.  You never know what you're gonna get."   That's what motherhood is all about.  It's unpredictable, but so rewarding when you bite into that piece of chocolate.  :)

Moms Night Outs Are Highly Recommended!

Written By: Jeanie Chang
 

That’s just what I did the other night.  I had a “mom’s night out” to see Lady Gaga in concert.  Okay, you may think that’s a little ridiculous or you think that’s totally cool.  Whatever the case, I have to say it was so much fun!  It did wonders for my mental well-being like all the other moms nights I have.  This is Lady Gaga so you know she’s going to put on quite a “show” and that’s just what she did.  Plus, she has a fabulous voice and let’s be honest, her songs are catchy and fun to dance to! Actually, the people-watching was just as much fun.  There were some outrageous costumes!  Anyways, I planned this “mom’s night out” months  ago in the spring when Lady Gaga tickets first went on sale and asked four of my friends who I knew would want to join me and have fun doing so!  I had a blast with my mom friends and forgot during the time I was there that I was a busy mom of four children.  I woke up physically tired, but mentally stimulated because I had a great night away from the kids!

You all know this, but I’ll say it anyway.  Moms need to take time off from the kids and enjoy themselves.  We need to remind ourselves who we are besides being a mom.  Being a mother is truly priceless, but let’s not forget we’re our own person too.  We all need to have fun in our own way, whether it’s going to see Lady Gaga or out to dinner and watching a movie or a Broadway show, etc.

I think regular nights out with your girlfriends or date nights with your spouse are crucial in maintaining a happy state-of-mind.  You need to step back away from your kids and the daily grind of house and home and regroup.  I’m sure you can’t deny that you agree with me even if it is really hard to leave your little ones or you feel uncomfortable leaving your kids with a sitter or even your husband.  Whatever the reason you give yourself on why you don’t go out once in a while with your girlfriends (or husband) – that’s just what they are – excuses.  If it’s hard for you to step back, force yourself to for your own sanity and for your family’s sake.  Having a night out will help you be rejuvenated and re-energized and it’ll be good for everyone around you!  I’m not just talking sporadically or once in a while, I’m talking about going out on a regular basis (monthly, bi-weekly, etc)

This is not just from my standpoint because now there’s a very successful campaign called National Mom’s Night Out which was founded in 2007 founded by a mother (of course) for the very reason that I’m talking about!  (Check out www.nationalmomsnight.com)  This is highly recommended!

I’m sure your spouse will find you more bearable to be around to when you’re back from a night out with the gals or your kids will find you so much more loving and understanding after a night out with your husband.  I’m a better mother to my children in all aspects and a better wife to my husband in all aspects when I have a time-out (out of the house!) on a regular basis.  I find that I miss them and am excited to see them the next morning.  I’m a new person!

This month’s mom’s night out was Lady Gaga.  That was a moms night out to remember and will last for a while!   Maybe I won’t even need a night out in October?  Just kidding.  I have already planned my night out in October.  Actually, I have my moms nights out and date nights planned for the next ten years.    That’s how important they are to me.

There's No Excuse For Not Trying"

Written By: Jeanie Chang


unescap.org

I really liked when President Obama said that in his back to school speech to the nation Tuesday afternoon.  I don't know about you, but I actually enjoyed his speech.  It didn't exude any political implications or controversy like last year's speech.  He seemed to be more down to earth in this speech than in others like he was just having a conversation with the students in the room.

President Obama's speech focused on the responsibility of the student on his/her success in life and how success is hard work which cannot be achieved without an education.  He shared that despite one's upbringing, social climate, background, etc - anyone and everyone can be successful should they choose to be.  It doesn't matter where you come from, if you choose success, it can be accomplished.  He also says to learn from your failures and not be afraid to make mistakes and ask questions.

"There's no excuse for not trying, " the President said.  I really wish my kids watched his speech with me.  Parents can do all that we can to ensure our childrens' success in life, but if they don't bother trying or want it for themselves, it won't work.  That's the brunt of his message and I totally agree.  For example, when my daughter was competing in the Young Artists' Piano competition last March, she was not practicing nearly enough to be completely prepared.  I could tell as she was practicing, her heart wasn't really in it and her teacher told me that if she kept that attitude up, she would be very ill prepared come competition day.  Well, what parent wants to hear that?  I sat my daughter down and asked her if she wanted to participate in this piano competition.  She told me she really did.  I asked her again if she was sure she really wanted to compete and she told me emphatically that she did!  All I could tell her was that she had to practice more diligently (basically work her butt off) the next month until the  competition if she really wanted to succeed and perform at a high standard.  That's all I could do.  I couldn't practice for her and even monitoring her practices only aggravated her so I had to trust she was practicing to the best of her ability!!!  It was a stressful time for me as a mom.

On the day of the competition, my daughter came out of the audition room and seemed content with her performance.  She says she played her best and made just one mistake, but the judge told her she did an excellent job.  I had no idea since parents weren't allowed in the room, so I took her word for it.  Well, that evening we got a call from her piano teacher and she was one of the winners in her category!  She was to perform in a winners recital the following Sunday.  I couldn't help but share with her the moral of the story, but my daughter already understood what it was.  She told me she was glad she practiced hard because it made her a winner.  That was a great lesson for her and I was reminded of that while watching President Obama's speech.

If your children are old enough, I highly recommend you watch the President's speech together with them.  You can find it on YouTube or any other news channel's website.

Save Money on Groceries!

Written By: Jeanie Chang

Photo via moneywise.co.uk

Are you wise about your family’s grocery purchases?  What I mean is do you finish products such as milk, eggs, bread before the expiration dates?  Our family wastes so much food that it’s so shameful!  After reading an article on the meaning behind food expiration dates,  I feel somewhat better knowing other families waste food as well.  The article says that the average family of four discards around $600 worth of groceries every year.  We’re definitely in that ballpark except we’re a family of six so maybe we throw out more groceries and waste more money?

This article provided me just the information I needed to make sure I don’t end up wasting products in my fridge that are still able to be consumed.  So, do you pour the milk down the drain on the exact expiration date?  Before reading this article, I have heard that you can still drink milk as long as it’s been properly refrigerated for about a week after the sell-by date.  I didn’t follow that though because I thought it was a myth.  Now that I’ve read it in this article, I’ll take it literally.  Another thing that surprised me is that eggs are still good at least three to five weeks after the sell-by date!   Basically products like yogurt, mayonnaise and cottage cheese can last at least ten days past the expiration date!  This will definitely help our family with preventing needless wasting of food and it saves me money when I have to run out to the grocery store because we didn’t finish our milk or eggs or whatever by the expiration date.   At least I know I have a window of time afterwards to finish up the food before purchasing more.   

Another important piece of information the article provides is differentiating between “sell-by” date and “use-by” date.  I’d like to share this with you because it probably will help you the next time you go grocery shopping.  The “use-by” date is the last day the item is at its best quality as far as taste, nutritional value and appearance, etc.  It gradually declines after that.  The “use by” date refers to products that have not been opened.  The “sell-by” date, which is not really a matter of food safety, is a notice to stores that the product should be taken off the shelves because its quality declines after that date. 

For more information, please read the article: http://green.yahoo.com/blog/care2/54/food-expiration-dates-what-do-they-really-mean.html .   One last thing, even if the expiration date on the product has not expired, if it looks moldy or smells spoiled – don’t eat it and throw it away!

To judge or not to judge?

Written by: Jeanie Chang


generalforum.com

Have you ever received criticism on your parenting skills from some random person or received unsolicited advice from a stranger about your child?  Or maybe it wasn’t a comment, but more like a look that spoke louder than words?  I just read a very interesting blog: http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com.  It’s written by a woman who wrote an article for the University of Baltimore Law Review about “how the tendency to judge mothering harshly plays out for the poor and minority women who come under scrutiny of the child welfare system.”  

She adapted this article into a blog for The New York Times and it really got me thinking.  You’ll need to read the blog before understanding what I have to say, but I can see her point.   I have been on both sides of what she’s talking about.  What I mean is, I was the one judging the parents of a child and I also received judgment from someone else after I became a mother.  Before having kids, I looked at the parents who had their toddlers on those kiddie leashes in GREAT disdain.  I remember thinking it was pretty much close to child abuse as you can get and I couldn’t believe the parents were walking around in public holding their child on a leash!  I learned to eat my words later when I considered getting one myself to control my active son who would run anywhere at any place any chance he got.  I completely understood the reason behind those kiddie leashes!

On the flip side, I have received a few jabs here and there about my parenting “skills” from random people.  The most blatant by far was the first comment I received after having my first child.  I was walking my daughter  who at the time was two months old in her stroller around the mall and she was napping peacefully on her tummy.  I know you’re not supposed to sleep your baby on your tummy, but my daughter preferred sleeping on her tummy.  Anyways, I was in the elevator and a woman (maybe in her sixties) turned to me and practically snapped my head off.  She told me the baby should be sleeping on her back and if the baby’s mother knew what I was doing, I’d be in ‘big trouble!’  Obviously, she thought I was a nanny or babysitter.  Anyways, I had to practically hold her back from flipping my daughter over onto her back.  It was a nasty encounter and that left me somewhat scarred for days.  Being a first-time mom and all, I was very sensitive.  If that happened now, I’d definitely have a witty comeback.  J  Since then, I have received looks or snide comments here and there about random things I was doing with my kids.  I’m sure you’ve had that experience as well.   What have you done about it?

The author of this blog, Chris Gottlieb knows what she’s talking about.  She’s with the Family Defense Clinic at New York University School of Law and represents parents accused of child abuse and neglect and tries to keep families together.   She points out that those who are in the position to make judgment on the parents accused of child abuse and neglect (in many cases, mainly the poor and minority parents) have such impossibly high standards that it’s going to set the parents up for failure no matter what.  Of course she is in no way diminishing the fact that there are cases where the child (ren) must be removed from their parents for their well-being.  But she’s saying we all need to reevaluate our tendency to approaching parenting with such “unforgiving” eyes.  Gottlieb goes on to say that the children would be better off if everyone viewed parenting by strangers the same as we view parenting by our friends and families – “generously” and without such a critical eye.  I really like this statement.  What are your thoughts on her blog?

Written by: Jeanie Chang