I don’t know about you, but whenever I think of back-to-school, I get a
little anxious and stressed and not really for my kids! You’d think I
would be anxious and stressed on behalf of my four children and the
fact they’re entering a new grade with a new teacher and encountering
new students in their class they do not know. But I’m anxious and
stressed because I know it means more work for me mentally (helping
with homework, being disciplined in keeping up their piano and violin
practices, chauffeuring them to their soccer practices, etc) and not
knowing what to expect.
1. Branch out – Friends are the main concern for our children (and us!) when entering a new class or school. If you child is younger, organize a playdate at a local park or playground with other parents with children the same age. When my son started Kindergarten last year, that’s exactly what I did with another mom. Together, we got 8 Kindergarten boys together with their moms for a playdate at a nearby park a few days before school started so we could all get acquainted. If you have a tween or teen, encourage him/her to participate on a sports team or school club so they can build friendships with those who have common interests or hobbies.
2. Celebrate Past Success - If your child is going to a new school, remind him/her that many things will stay the same. For example, if you have an incoming Kindergartener, tell him/her there will be a teacher and recess time just like in preschool as well as some friends going to the same school.
3. Plan and Practice – Many children are reassured by routines. If your child is elementary school age, you can do a run-through to show your child how to find their classroom and the bathroom as well as the cafeteria, etc. My 1st grader is in the main school building this year and our school has a “Meet The Teacher” day two days before the start of school so that’s when I’ll be doing a dry run-through for him to see where everything is. If your child is older, you can schedule a tour of the school beforehand or even map out where their classes are located.
4. Meet the Teacher – As mentioned above, some schools have an organized “Meet the Teacher” day so they can get acquainted with their teacher before school starts. If your school does not, it’s a good idea to plan a meeting with your child’s new teacher so he/she will feel less intimidated knowing the teacher is now a familiar face.
5. Think and Act Positive – Make sure you are positive and upbeat about the change your child is experiencing, even if you are feeling some apprehension yourself. You being positive will help your child feel confident! This is something I really try to focus on as I’m nervous and stressed myself about back-to-school, but if I show my kids my anxiety, they’d only feel anxious too and that’s the last thing I want!
For us moms, here are some tips I suggest you use to prevent back to school stress:
1. We all get stressed about back to school shopping for supplies (and clothes). Why not make your life easier and purchase a school supply kit? That's what I do! My school uses SchoolKidz and we can order school supply kits ahead of time. For example, last May when my daughter was in fourth grade, I ordered a fifth grade school supply kit. That's all there was to it and it was ready to be picked up at Meet the Teacher a couple days prior to the first day of school! Check it out at www.schoolkidz.com .
2. When you see your teacher at Meet the Teacher or before the start of school, ask if you can get her contact email if it isn't already offered in their welcome letter. Teachers are more than willing to give it to you and it makes you feel better knowing you can contact your teacher when needed. One note: Don't stalk your teacher and ask needless questions because it makes him less willing to talk to you.
3. Go over bus safety and etiquette. Your child's school day begins and ends on the school bus so it's important to ensure they have a good experience. Get to know your bus driver and communicate with him/her as often as needed about any red flags you see. For example, some of the headaches I encountered last year happened on the bus. Your child may have a conflict with another student or vice versa and it happens on the bus. Always ask your child what happened so you’re clear on what happened. If you need to intervene, first talk to the bus driver. When it requires more serious action (which it did in my case), go straight to the Ass. Principal.
4. Have a family meeting several days before school to lay out a few ground rules. This is a perfect time to talk about homework rules, activities, bedtime disciplines (which is always an issue after a long summer) and snack and lunch habits. It’s a great time to communicate with your children and create an understanding between you. Much of the stress and anxiety I experience is my expectations of my children when school starts so this is the time you can share them.
5. Buy a family planner and get organized together. I can’t wait to implement this in my family. My husband and I do a lot of tag-teaming where he’ll take two kids and I’ll take two kids to various activities and events so we both need to know where the other is and where the kids are at what time and which place. A family planner can help you be less of a frazzled mom. I’ve heard great things about Anna Knapp’s Family Organizer. (www.familyorganizer.com)
If all else fails, keep in mind that your kids are now going to be in school all day (or part of the day if you have a preschooler) which means you’ll have more free time during the day and get some of your sanity back!
By: Jeanie Chang
Comments