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First Experiences

Written by: Tracy Eunice Shin

I wish I had the time and the energy to jot down into my personal journal the daily happenings, no mater how ordinary or mundane, of my three-year-old's everyday life. Because Abbie is my first (and only) child, seeing the world through her eyes is so exciting to me, and not to mention refreshing. All the things that we adults take for granted, a little child appreciates.

The very first time Abbie saw a snail, she thought he was was beautiful. She even went ahead and named him Pingu, then proceeded to bring him water and a slice of ham. The very first time Abbie saw my neighbor's rather large, black cat roaming around in our backyard, she said he was a giant black panther roaming around the rainforest of Ungeejee (yeah, she made up the country). And just yesterday, when she saw for the very first time two rabbits...., ummm, how should I say this, "doing the deed" in their cage (and I told her I had no idea what they were doing after she asked me for the 100th time), she quite knowingly explained to me that they were doing yoga, because they felt they were getting a little too heavy around their mid-section.

Last week - thanks to Clara, Hyun and Nathan - Abbie got to experience the sport of bowling for the very first time.

 

Below: "Ok Abbie, you see those pins allllll the way down there? Yeah, well you take this ball and you try and knock every single one down, got it?

 

"Mommy, what ball? How come I don't have a ball? What ball? Where is the ball? Did God make the ball? How come I don't have a ball at home? Do you have a ball? Where is daddy's ball?

Below: "Look, see where the boys are? That's where the ball comes out, go grab your own ball.

 

 Below: "Ok, now we are going to hold the ball like this.... and throw the ball like this.... and we are going to aim right down the middle so that we can knock all the pins down, got it?"

 

So yeah, Abbie did manage to stop asking questions just long enough to "throw" the ball down the lane, but you see, she only weighs like 30 lbs, and the ball weighed a good 7 lbs, so the amount of energy she exerted from her tiny little arms to throw this rather large ball was not much, not much at all. And to no surprise, it took quite awhile for this rather large, green, seven pound ball to make its way down this rather long lane....

40 seconds went by...

one minute....

two minutes...

and after what felt like 30 long minutes for this green ball to slowly lull itself down the lane, the attention span of my three-year-old had already expired, and Abbie was long gone.

(Just for the record, Abbie's very first attempt at bowling resulted in knocking down three pins, yay!)

 

But the story does not end here. As always, this is the story of my life, I try to teach Abbie one simple sport of bowling, and it turns out to be a disaster. But leave it to Brian to come along, spin the situation around, and TADAH! after only a minute with him, Abbie is now in love with the sport.

Below: "Here Abbie, I'll (Brian speaking) show you a better way to bowl. You see this thing here? Well, it's a big slide for all bowling balls. And just like you, all the balls love going down slides. Now place your ball here and let it roll!

And just like that, she scored a spare! "DADDY!!!! LOOOOOK!!! DADDYYYYY!!!! I DID IT, I DID IT!!!!!! WOW! DADDYYY!!!"

Leave it to daddy to save the day.

 

Below: "Daddy, can you buy me a bowling alley tomorrow? I promise I'll brush my teeth everyday!"

"No Abbie, I can't buy you the Cerritos Bowling Alley because it is too expensive. But you still have to brush your teeth everyday."

"Ok fine, then you can just buy me this air table. But I'm only going to brush at night"

 

Below: Happy fifth birthday, Nathan! We had so much fun celebrating this big day with you!

 ~ Tracy

My Latest Retail Conquest: Finding The Perfect Diaper Bag!

I have this skip*hop bag. It's practical, no-nonsense, and has all the bells and whistles. It is well received by reviewers with a four-start rating (generally).

3

The only major problem is that I feel like I'm straining my back and arms and butt (hehe) whenever I carry this thing around since I'm a petite gal. I think it has to do with the fact that it is a long and narrow bag as opposed to wide and roomy. It has all that I need, but it is incredibly uncomfortable for me to lug around. It's also kind of on the heavier side... so lately, I've opted to use a super lightweight longchamp bag my mother in law gave to me for my birthday as my diaper bag. While the shape and weight of the longchamp bag is ideal, it has one very small compartment inside (small enough for a few cards and a pen and a lipgloss. Not ideal when you have a bajillion baby thingers to carry around.

I'm not sure if it's just me, but even for a handbag OBSESSER like me, my handbags have been getting the boot since owen was born. Having to carry a diaper bag AND a handbag at the same time seems excessive and silly to me. I do it sometimes, but when I'm short on time (which is the case almost always), I spend 99% of my time gathering Owen's things and about 1% of the time stuffing my wallet, keys and lipgloss into the diaper bag. 

I need something CUTE, FUNCTIONAL, SMART, LIGHTWEIGHT! It really has to be cute enough to be a stand-in for my normal handbag.

Here are my top contenders.. they're a wee pricier than what I'd like to spend but I can't seem to find anything cute anywhere else! What cha think?

1) Marc Jacobs Baby Bag

 

2) Kate Spade Dungrees Baby Bag

 

3) Kate Spade Quilted Nylon

 

4) Burberry Diaper Camera Bag

 

5) Not Rational -  Hansel Diaper Bag :  LINK

6) Rebecca Minkoff Diaper Bag: LINK

 

Written by: Jenny Park Kim

Sharing Kimchee With Other Mommies!

Written By: Jeanie Chang


iheartkimchi.wordpress.com

My children's violin teacher loves kimchee!  I mean she loves it so much that she and her husband can go through an entire jar in a week.  The other night, she told me she was making kimchee fried rice after doing some research on the Internet on how to make it.  I thought that was so cool.  My kids' violin teacher is Caucasian and born and bred in North Carolina.  She actually told me she wishes she had been born Korean because she loves the food.  LOL.  After all, she says she grew up on southern cuisine which she finds to be dull compared to Asian cuisine.  You know - fried chicken, pulled pork, hush puppies, biscuits and gravy, okra,etc.  Since moving to Raleigh, North Carolina four years ago, I have definitely enjoyed trying southern food.  As much as I like it, I definitely couldn't live on it.

My kids' violin teacher isn't the only non-Korean mommy I know that loves Korean food.  I have a very diverse group of mommy friends who have been exposed to Korean food through me and they all love it.  I have had to figure out how to give them recipes for bulgogi and kalbi and even dduk boh gkee because they (and their husbands) love it so much they want to make it at home.  I'm sure you all can agree that most Korean food do not really follow an exact recipe.  I have learned how to cook Korean through watching my mom or by taste.  Anyways, my mommy friends are quite happy with the recipes I've provided them so obviously I did something right!

After talking to my kids' violin teacher and offering as much advice as I could about cooking Korean food, I realized how much fun it was sharing with a non-Korean mommy about my culture.  Food is a huge part of culture!  I told her that I'll have to make her some kalbi after she told me she uses the store-bought sauce to make her Korean beef and she looked so excited that it gave me a wonderful idea for the holiday season!  Guess what I decided to do for some of my mommy friends for Christmas?

If you haven't guessed, I'm going to put together a Korean food care package as Christmas gifts!  Yep, they'll love it as will their husbands and kids.  Of course my violin teacher will receive a Korean food care package too.  What will I include in those care packages?  Let's see: a small container of kimchee, homemade kalbi or bulgogi,some Korean rice (my friends LOVE our rice) and a couple Asian pears as dessert.  I cut up some Asian pears which I put into a fruit salad for a luncheon at my son's preschool and everyone commented on how delicious they were!

Although the food is perishable, they won't have to be forced to eat it on the day I give it to them since the meat can be frozen within two days and we all know kimchee can last quite a while.  LOL.

Besides sharing love, joy and peace this holiday season.  I wanted to share kimchee!!!

Bidding Farewell to the Beloved Babysitter

Written By: Jeanie Chang 

christianbabysitter.homestead.com

 

It was like losing a family member when our family had to give a heart-wrenching goodbye to our family babysitter.  After three wonderful years with us, she moved on to greener pastures.  More specifically, a new job in Charlotte which is about three hours away.  The kids were really sad, but I was devastated!  My husband sympathized with me, but it was really me who mourned her loss.  Of course, I was happy for her job promotion and the fact that she was moving to be near her boyfriend (soon to be fiance) so I couldn't deny that it was a great move for her.  But not so good for our family with four kids!  When she told me the news,  I could see how hard it was for her to tell me not only because she knew I would be saddened, but because she truly cared for my kids!  She loves them!  She has been with us since our little one was seven months old and he'll be four in January so she's been his only babysitter.  My first thought was "OMG, I need to find another great babysitter pronto!"   Then the sadness came because I grew to love our babysitter as a part of our family, but my first thought was of panic because great childcare is hard to find especially if you have four kids!

I'm in a tizzy trying to find the right babysitter for my kids.  First of all, the timing couldn't be worse (on my end) because we're entering the holiday season which means holiday events, girls night outs, Christmas parties, cookie exchanges, couples parties, etc!  I need my trustworthy and loving babysitter more than ever during the holiday season!  My husband and I have a commitment every weekend through January so I'm really in a tizzy!

Believe it or not, I found my beloved  sitter on Craigslist!  I love that site.  I wrote up my own ad and received tons of email responses.  But, I weeded out the unimpressive ones and narrowed it down to three.  My babysitter was the first one I interviewed and I canceled the rest of the interviews with the other two potentials because I knew she was the one.  First of all, I liked her email response to me - confident about her abilities without sounding too cocky, she was certified in CPR and First Aid (AWESOME!) and she was an MBA student.  Impressive.  When I met her, I wasn't so sure about her judging from her appearance.  She wore a lot of makeup and was too attractive.  LOL.  But, when I sat down with her and got to know her - she won me over with her genuineness and kindness and I could tell she really did like kids!  It did help that she was the fourth child in a family of five children.

That said, I haven't decided whether I'll place another Craigslist ad.  I do believe I could get lucky again through Craigslist.  But, I do have a potential babysitter that I'm getting to know and she seems to be a good fit so far.  She was recommended by a friend of mine.  Her personality is NOTHING like my previous sitter so I have to get past that, but this one is a first grade teacher (can't beat that) and she's married and settled.  I have tried her out twice and my kids say they really liked her.  She passed the first step, now she has to win me over.  I think that will be hard because of my first babysitter who I consider to be the very best out there.  (SIGH)

I know I need to move on, but it's hard.  I'm still in mourning.  She only moved a couple weeks ago and we keep in touch via Facebook and text.  She was so sad when she knew my husband and I had a fundraiser to attend last week and I used the new sitter.  She texted me that it was so hard for her knowing that she had to be replaced.  HEARTWRENCHING!  Who else would care for your kids really well besides you, your husband, the grandparents or other relatives?  She's just as good as any relative in my family!!!

I think I will be in mourning through the holiday season.  Until then, this new sitter is on a trial basis.  I shall see whether she can live up to my beloved babysitter!  I'm just kidding.  I'm not that bad!  But, my standards are high because they were set high from the beginning by our angel of a sitter.  Have any of you gone through what I'm going through now?  Let me tell you, if you find a great babysitter for your kids - treat her well!!!!!!  After all, she's taking care of your kids and you're entrusting them in her care.

I hope I can get over this loss really soon.  Wish me luck!

Each Child Is Unique!

Written By: Jeanie Chang
safekidskansas.org

If you have more than one child, I'm sure you can agree with that statement.  Maybe your oldest is strong willed and second child is just relaxed as he/she can be.  I read in a parenting book a long time ago (before I had kids) that you actually cannot parent or discipline each child the same way.  It has taken me 10 years to finally get it!

You may have a child that responds really well with a time out or maybe time outs don't work for your child.  Maybe you need to resort to a stronger form of discipline.  Whatever the case,  each child will respond and act differently.  I'm learning to understand and accept my children's different personalities.  My older two are more reserved and easy-going while my younger two (both boys) are very active. My youngest is also very strong-willed. 

It's funny because I could say the same sentence to all four kids and receive different reactions!  For instance, my second child and oldest son is very sensitive.  If I have a hint of a sharp tone because I'm annoyed or frustrated and talk to him in that manner, he gets very upset and teary-eyed.  Meanwhile, I have the same sharp tone and show the same annoyance and frustration to my daughter and my second son and they don't even blink an eye.  My fourth child  - he'd snap right back at me!  LOL.

I'm writing this to remind myself that the differences in my children are special and should be appreciated.  When my older two children were little, they were so shy that it irritated me because they wouldn't  participate in any activities with other children.  My younger two are so outgoing that I complain they're too active and talkative!  LOL.   

Each of my kids definitely respond to discipline in different ways.  For instance, my daughter never understood that time outs were a form of punishment.  If I told her to sit in the corner or go up to her room when she got in trouble, she actually enjoyed it!  I'd find her sitting there singing and when she was sent to her room, she'd be reading or drawing.  Time outs did not work for her so I had to resort to spanking.  That worked for her!

On the flip side, my second and third sons would react like it was the end of the world when I sent them to time out and they would go kicking and screaming and crying all the way.  I refused to let them come out of time out until they calmed themselves down!  Worked like a charm for them because they hated time outs!

My fourth child, my 3.5 year old, is an interesting one.  He doesn't seem to mind time outs or spanking!  Believe it or not, what works for best for him when he's being disciplined is talking calmly and rationally with him and holding a conversation about what he did wrong and why!  It takes a lot more patience for me to do that but I find it really helps him.  Go figure.

How are your experiences with parenting and disciplining your child if you have more than one?  Do you find that each child does in fact react differently to the same form of discipline?  Do you have children with completely opposite personalities and you're wondering how they came from the same mom (and dad)?   I wonder everyday.  LOL.  If they act up, I just think, "they take after their father!"  LOL. 

Each child is unique and should be appreciated for who they are.  I'm trying to be mindful of that because when I get frustrated or annoyed or fed up, it's because I want to change the fact that my son is so active he won't sit still or my other son just wants to sit around all day playing Wii or DS or read a book or that my daughter is so laid back her room is a pigsty....the list goes on!  But, this is who they are and of course I love them.

A Unique "Girls Night In" :: K-Drama & Manicure Party

Written By: Jeanie Chang
 

Thanks to KOKO Living, I enjoyed a unique ladies night "in" recently with my TAKE ladies!  TAKE or Triangle American Korean Exchange is a group I created earlier this year to bring together women in the Triangle area (Raleigh-Durham-Chapel Hill) who are of Korean heritage from different backgrounds  and upbringings.

After enjoying a delicious Korean dinner by our hostess (one of the TAKE ladies), we had the best time doing manicures and watching the first episode of a popular Korean television series called "Two Outs, Bottom of the 9th Inning"  courtesy of YA Entertainment.

We didn't do traditional manicures mind you where you color your nails with nail polish.  No, we used Incoco dry nail manicure sets to do our nails up pretty!  Incoco makes self-stick 100% nail polish strips which contain the base coat, color coat and top coat!  You avoid the spills of messy nail polish bottles and avoid the long wait time for the nail polish to dry!  We did our dry nail appliques right on my friend's nice cream-color carpet.  You just peel off the colored nail strip, stick them on your fingernails and cut off the excess with your nails.  VOILA!  You have a perfectly manicured nail in seconds! 

When I first showed them Incoco's dry nail manicure set, all the ladies seemed skeptical.  It did look a little unbelievable what with the colored stickers and all.  Almost like something our daughters would play with.  But, once we applied them on our nails, it really did look like we had just gotten manicures from a professional nail salon!  Everyone was quite impressed with Incoco's dry nail sets.

After our dry nail manicures, we settled in to watch the first episode of "Two Outs, Bottom of the 9th Inning."  Thankfully, YA Entertainment provided us the entire DVD set of the series so we can continue watching the series and finish it.  We all know Korean TV dramas are addicting and you just can't watch one episode and be done with it!

My T.A.K.E. group is really diverse when it comes to our backgrounds and upbringings with our Korean heritage.  We are all Korean.  But, some women were adopted from Korea by non-Korean families so they weren't exposed to Korean culture such as someone like me who grew up with traditional 1st generation Korean immigrant parents.  They didn't know what to expect from watching an episode from a Korean TV series.  I'm so glad they were game to try it out!  Thanks to the subtitles, they were able to understand everything and see a glimpse of the culture in Korea nowadays.   I think they really enjoyed seeing the culture on television.

Courtesy of KOKO Living and YA Entertainment, everyone left with a goody bag.  What an awesome ladies night "in" it was!  I think they got a little spoiled because they asked what else KOKO Living could provide us to enjoy another ladies night soon!  They are game!

If you're interested in hosting your own Girls Night In for your next meet-up, please email: [email protected] .

(one of the TAKE ladies), we had the best time doing manicures and watching the first episode of a popular Korean television series called "Two Outs, Bottom of the 9th Inning"  courtesy of YA Entertainment.

We didn't do traditional manicures mind you where you color your nails with nail polish.  No, we used Incoco dry nail manicure sets to do our nails up pretty!  Incoco makes self-stick 100% nail polish strips which contain the base coat, color coat and top coat!  You avoid the spills of messy nail polish bottles and avoid the long wait time for the nail polish to dry!  We did our dry nail appliques right on my friend's nice cream-color carpet.  You just peel off the colored nail strip, stick them on your fingernails and cut off the excess with your nails.  VOILA!  You have a perfectly manicured nail in seconds! 

When I first showed them Incoco's dry nail manicure set, all the ladies seemed skeptical.  It did look a little unbelievable what with the colored stickers and all.  Almost like something our daughters would play with.  But, once we applied them on our nails, it really did look like we had just gotten manicures from a professional nail salon!  Everyone was quite impressed with Incoco's dry nail sets.

After our dry nail manicures, we settled in to watch the first episode of "Two Outs, Bottom of the 9th Inning."  Thankfully, YA Entertainment provided us the entire DVD set of the series so we can continue watching the series and finish it.  We all know Korean TV dramas are addicting and you just can't watch one episode and be done with it!

My T.A.K.E. group is really diverse when it comes to our backgrounds and upbringings with our Korean heritage.  We are all Korean.  But, some women were adopted from Korea by non-Korean families so they weren't exposed to Korean culture such as someone like me who grew up with traditional 1st generation Korean immigrant parents.  They didn't know what to expect from watching an episode from a Korean TV series.  I'm so glad they were game to try it out!  Thanks to the subtitles, they were able to understand everything and see a glimpse of the culture in Korea nowadays.   I think they really enjoyed seeing the culture on television.

Courtesy of KOKO Living and YA Entertainment, everyone left with a goody bag.  What an awesome ladies night "in" it was!  I think they got a little spoiled because they asked what else KOKO Living could provide us to enjoy another ladies night soon!  They are game!

If you're interested in hosting your own Girls Night In for your next meet-up, please email: [email protected] .

Today's Spotlight: The Real KAMs of Southern California

 Written by: Tracy Hyon Shin

I was the first to arrive. There were twelve in total. A fashion designer, a corporate lawyer, a senior systems analyst, Ms. Korea, a jewelry designer, a resource writer, a triathlete, a financial consultant, a capoeira instructor, an award winning photographer, a dentist, and a freelance writer.

So let's take some guesses now, shall we. You tell me, what kind of a gathering was this? A professional networking group? Alcoholics Shopaholics Anonymous? Members of the jury?

If you said yes to any of the choices above, you are wrong (well technically, we can actually fit in all three groups, but...), for these twelve women are all members of KAM - Korean American Mommies group, connected through the fabulous KOKOliving's KAM page. And last thursday, these twelve So Cal KAMs decided to forgo cooking dinner for just one night, leave behind their crying babies and husbands, and gather together for a Girls-Night-Out dinner at the delectable Hokkaido Seafood Buffet in Long Beach, California.

 

Above: The four gals who actually showed up right on time!

Above: Group shot

 

And oh what a night it was! From piles of crab legs to dim sum to eye-popping conversations, it sure was a night to remember.

Now here's the thing, I don't care just how much fun single girls think they have when they go out for a Girls-Night-Out, cause there is nothing, and I mean  n o t h i n g  that they can do that is even remotely comparable to the amount of fun the mamas have when we go out for a GNO. Now before all you singles start rolling your eyes and swagging your fingers at me, please allow me to explain why:

REASON #1: For singles, "going out" happens whenever they want and however often they want. Heck, in my single years, I probably went out thursday to sunday every week of the month, rain or shine! But for moms, going out happens oh, I would say just about... once in every blue moon.

REASON #2: For singles, going out requires no planning in advance (well, other than maybe making reservations for a table). You call your friends, see if they are free, and then you go out, simple as that. But for moms, planning a "night out" sans kids takes as much meticulous planning as planning a dohl janchee (Korean First Birthday Celbration)! Not only must she find a date that works for herself and all her girlfriends, but it must also be a date that works for all the husbands involved as well (or else who's going to be home to take over baby duty?!). And if for whatever reason the husband cannot get his act together in time to get home early, mom must move to Plan B and attempt to find a reliable babysitter for the night. Now, this may sound simple enough for some of you, but do take my word for it, these days, you would have better luck finding a pair of Louboutins for under 300 dollars than you would finding a trustworthy nanny/babysitter.

And last but not least,

Reason #3: For singles, getting ready is a breeze. Let's face it, all you singles gals have closets that break down into the 20/80 ratio - twenty percent work attire, eighty percent "going out" attire. From the latest trends to the hottest picks, reality is, you own them all. So though you may dawdle for just a little while debating over what you should wear, we all know you make your selection from a mountainous load of options. But for moms, well, we also have our closets broken down to a ratio, but it's a bit more skewed, for it breaks down into sometime like 9 to 91. Yeah, nine percent recently purchased clothes and ninety one percent outdated, pre-pregnancy clothes. So the task at hand of finding something cute to wear for the night (as in, something some what fashionable and can  fit on our new, rounded figures) is often considered harder to do than finding the cure for colic.

So you see, the point I'm trying to make here is that it doesn't really matter what we mamas do when we go out for our Girls-Night-Outs. We can be sitting in a cheap, AYCE Chinese buffet in the middle of ghetto-ton suburbia for all that matters, when it comes down to the scale-o-meter of fun, a stay-at-home mama will consider her one night out far more fun than whatever it is that you glamorous singles do, any day of the week.

*Whew!* Now that I've got all my pent up ranting out of my system here on this platform for all Mamas of America, I think I should just climb back down now and get back to last thursday night.

So, last thursday, knowing in advance that I would be writing this article, I intentionally sat right in the middle of our long twelve seater table. This way, I got the opportunity to listen in on all the micro-conversations that was taking place around me.

To tell you the truth, I don't even know where to start right now for just thinking about a few of the details discussed that night is making me giggle and turn red at this very moment....

The thing is, when I go out with my group of single girlfriends, it takes a few martinis before all of us loosen up and get (verbally) lewd. But with my mama friends, well, it seems to only take a few sips of water before these ladies get comfortable and let loose! In fact, there is never any alcohol involved when the So Cal KAMs go out, but ironically, they always take the cake for the wildest dinner conversations! Now why is this? Do we just lose all self censors and throw all shame out the window when we cross over into the land of motherhood? Have we all just reached the ultimate ahjuma status?

After some dwelling, I was able to reach only one explanation: We stay-at-home-moms are cooped up at home all day for so long with no adult interaction that when we do finally get out, all that pent up energy and craving of adult conversation comes erupting out of us like an explosion! Therefore, we have no inhibitions, no boundaries, and no censors. All lewd talk comes spewing out for the mere fact that there is (finally!) not one child in our presence. (Yes, I know, sounds like a lame explanation, but that is our reality).

So getting back to last thursday, even though we all knew the restaurant was packed (and we all know we have extremely loud voices), it didn't stop us from talking about sex, sex positions, who is having sex (and who is not), whom we would like to have sex with (Brad Pitt, anyone?), our ovulation cycles, circumcision, the best form of birth control, penis size, ethnic nannies, nanny agencies, best makeup remover (see, we do have some "normal" women talk; sometimes), lazy husbands, and dry vaginas.

Now, who at this time would like to know the fine details of these topics? For in fact, thanks to my superb memory, I can even repeat back to you word for word just some of what was discussed that night. It sure would give a terrific perspective into the minds of us stay-at-home-moms, don't you think?

But you know what, though I would just love to reveal all the juicy details of the mind blowing conversations we had that night here onto this article.... I will not. No, I must not, for I abide by the strict universal Girl-Code known to all women-kind (and I also don't want to get hunted down with sticks by these eleven fabulous women). So instead of leaving you with verbal details of the night, I'll leave you instead with just these fun pictures of the night, enjoy.

 

Above: Sarah and Jenny, what's so funny?

 

Above: Jeanette and Skippee, do share, what is so funny??

Above: And why do we Asian women love buffets so much??

 

Above: From left to right - Connie, Kathy, Jeanette, Jenny, Sarah, myself, Skippee, Helen, Sue, Yuewen, Caroline (missing Kayla in the picture).

 

**A big thank you to Connie and Caroline for planning this fun night, and thank you to everyone for  coming out in the midst of all that LA traffic. Looking forward to seeing you all again, next month, at the Tava Lounge in Artesia (for any other So Cal KAMs interested in joining us for dinner on the first thursday of every month, please leave a comment at the end of this article and Caroline will get back to you with all the details).

Christine Park 'TV News Mom' :: An Interview

We have Fresno, California's very own TV anchor and reporter Christine Park's story to share with you today!  First off you may think 'How glamorous, fabulous and she must have a great life?' Well, I think so! But, in her own fun way, she tells us how it can and may not be, so hold on to your seats, you're going into G-Force levels with a splash of mommy honesty which is oh-so refreshing!

Please, share a mini bio of your life.
I was born in a small hospital in Apple Valley, in the California desert. I think my family was the only Korean family in the city of Barstow. My parents owned a small grocery store there, chasing the American dream. That meant we moved around A LOT, as they pursued a number of small business opportunities: Glendale, Fullerton, Stanton, Alhambra, Diamond Bar, to name a few. I went to three or four different elementary schools, two different high schools.

My brother Brian was born 11 months, 2 weeks after me. He was my best friend and partner in crime. We never fought (at least I can’t recall). But that may have something to do with the fact that when he was born, I bit his finger so hard, to this day, he has problems with it, and will require surgery. I tell him, I was merely establishing dominance early on. I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised, then, when my own daughter bit her baby brother’s finger.  Sigh, poor thing, it was his destiny.

My sister was born when I was six. She was a chubby, mischievous tomboy, and her initial endearing cuteness wore off quickly when I realized how much trouble she could get into (because I was always held responsible). My parents worked very hard, as many immigrants do, to provide us with every possible opportunity in life – private school, piano lessons, taekwondo, computer tutors, art classes… but my favorite activity growing up was free: weekly trips to the library. I loved books and I loved to read. I attended Diamond Bar High School for barely a semester.

Just when I thought I had found my niche (in a group of all Asian friends), we moved again, this time to Fresno. It was devastating. I didn’t speak to my parents for two months. The student body at Clovis West High School in Fresno was predominantly white. It took me months to find friends. But it taught me what it was like to be out of my comfort zone and still succeed. I will never forget the day someone asked me where I was from. I said, “Southern California.” “No,” he said, “WHERE are you from, you know, your family.” I said, “Korea.” He said, “What’s that?”

How was it growing up as a Korean American girl?
I don’t think I really noticed that I was different from my Caucasian friends until Kindergarten. There was a little Japanese boy named James in my class, and he was the only one that looked like me. So naturally, he became the boy I “liked.” So when we played girls chase boys on the playground, I went after him.

My parents insisted we go to Korean language/culture school every Saturday in Hacienda Heights. So instead of watching Saturday morning cartoons, we endured a sixth day of school. But I am so grateful for that experience, because I can read, write, and speak Korean. I learned fan dancing and drum dancing as well as calligraphy and songs. To this day, I can sing that Korean school’s anthem without missing a beat. My mom taught me the quiet pride, beauty and grace of being a Korean woman. I loved putting on my hanbok every New Year’s. The hundreds of dollars we got from our elders for showing our respect (seh-beh) didn’t hurt either.

We didn’t eat a ton of Korean food on a day to day basis. We were a mac ‘n’ cheese, fish sticks kind of family. My mom and paternal grandmother (who lived with us) worked late every day, so dinner was whatever was fastest. But I do recall my grandma made some delicious rice krispie treats! How very un-Korean!

We spoke a mix of English and Korean at home… Konglish! Growing up in Southern California, it’s easy to be Korean American. There are so many others like you. I only distinctly became aware of my differences when I moved to Fresno in high school. I considered trying out for pep and cheer but balked at the thought of being the only minority on the squad. The largest group of Asians at my school was Hmong. I didn’t even know what that was. One of my best friends (originally from Texas) told me I was her first “Oriental” friend. I was glad to educate her about my background and my culture. She is still one of my best friends to this day. I eventually found my way, embracing my new home.

Like a dutiful daughter, I dove headfirst into my studies, taekwondo (I was a red belt before I hurt my knee), church, and all the clubs and organizations I could manage to pad my resume with. I wanted to go to Stanford. I loved high school. I wasn’t popular or unpopular – just comfortably in the middle, friends with the nerds and jocks. I was never ashamed of being Korean American. Maybe only when the house smelled like kimchi when my friends came over. LOL But I was distinctly aware that the popular Asian kids all seemed “white-washed”… meaning they didn’t speak their parents’ native language, they had all Caucasian friends, etc.

What is your favorite childhood memory?
My mom was always working, but somehow she managed to be an amazing mother to us kids as well. I never felt like she wasn’t there for me—spelling bees, award ceremonies, piano recitals, school projects, you name it. She also really knew how to throw a party. Every one of our birthdays was an event. My favorite childhood memory was my 6th birthday and my brother’s 5th birthday (we always had our parties together when we were little). There was a puppet theater in our neighborhood. My mom, 7 months pregnant with her third child, rented the place out, and the theater put on an amazing show centered around our birthdays. We had the best time and I felt so special. I wore my best pink lace dress and had flowers in my hair. To this day, I remember the sheer joy of dancing and clapping with my friends and family.

What did you study / major in during your college years - which school?
I thought I wanted to be a doctor. My family wanted me to be a doctor. I attended UC Berkeley (I didn’t get into Stanford) intending to major in Biology. My freshman year was a huge wakeup call. I did terribly. Chemistry kicked my butt. No matter how much I studied, I couldn’t get it. I did some major self-evaluation my sophomore year, looking at what I was good at and what I really enjoyed: reading, speaking, writing. I was clearly in the wrong major. I did an internship at a TV station that summer, and I was hooked. It was such an adrenaline rush and so gratifying. I changed my major to Mass Communications my junior year and suddenly classes become enjoyable again. Everything came naturally again. I graduated with honors and pursued a career in journalism with a single-minded focus. I still distinctly remember telling my parents I didn’t want to be a doctor. I thought they’d be furious and disappointed. I think they were disappointed, but they were very supportive. I was so relieved, and I promised to make them proud.

 

Tell us a little bit about being a mommy and having your own children now.
I was never one of those girls who dreamed about having a family. I was always very career and achievement oriented. Even when I got married, kids were an afterthought. Sure, I wanted them, but not for awhile. Then literally, overnight, that all changed. My husband Gene and I had been married for three years, and were having the time of our lives. We traveled to some amazing locations, including the Bahamas, Italy, and Hawaii. We had bought our first home. My career as a TV reporter was taking off. And then my biological clock started ticking on overdrive. I was 29. I wanted a baby yesterday. LOL. A baby girl, to be exact. One that I could dress up in the most adorable outfits, play princess tea parties with, plan her wedding with.

We got pregnant relatively easily and I was sick as a dog. I lost ten pounds my first trimester, and the only things I could eat without throwing up were watermelon, yook-ggeh-jahng (spicy beef stew) and naeng-myun (cold buckwheat noodles). I knew it was a girl. My mom knew it too – she told me she had had a dream of brilliant jewels, which apparently signifies a girl. But when the ultrasound confirmed it, I burst into tears of joy. It was one of the happiest moments of my life. Sydney (named after Jennifer Garner’s character in Alias) was born September 20, 2006. She was an easy, happy baby. Such a joy to raise. But to be honest, being on maternity leave, I felt like I was losing myself. My job was so much of who I was and still am.

So I went back to work when she was 2 ½ months old. I was a pumping machine, pumping in the live truck while out on stories, pumping in a tiny bathroom at a New York City club on my first trip away from her. That lasted 10 months. When she was two, we discovered she had a birth defect called tethered spinal cord, it affects her leg, bowel, and bladder control. So far, she had developed normally, but we knew we had to do something, or she could suffer from incontinence and leg pain her entire life. I NEVER worried before I became a mom. I was always a go-with-the-flow kind of person. But the constant worry that came with this new role sometimes became overwhelming. The thought that someone’s life and well being are in your hands, is a heavy, sobering realization.

When Sydney was diagnosed, I was pregnant with our second child, our son Isaiah. Again, I was so sick my doctor put me on Zofran (anti-nausea medicine they usually prescribe for chemo patients). We had to get extra tests and ultrasounds to make sure he didn’t have any spinal defects. It was nerve-wracking. Isaiah was born April 21, 2009. Thank God he was born completely healthy, without the same condition as his sister. He was an easy baby too. But people don’t tell you how the second child doesn’t just double the work, it quadruples it. It’s like there were exponentially more things to do. My daughter, the center of our worlds, suddenly was competing for attention and she didn’t like it one bit. I remember distinctly wondering, how am I going to do this? How do I balance everything, without dropping the ball on something? This time, I was NOT ready to go back to work, but I had an amazing support network: my husband, my mom, and our Korean nanny, Kona, who make day to day sanity a possibility.

In July of this year, Sydney had surgery at UCLA to de-tether her spinal cord and close up her spinal column. I would say it was one of the most frightening times of my life. I had to be strong, but there was one moment of weakness, when I left her in the operating room as they were putting her under anesthesia, and I was escorted to the waiting area. I lost it. I just started bawling. I had absolutely no control. The surgery went well, but there were a lot of complications during recovery. Sydney’s bladder stopped working and she developed an infection. We were in the hospital for 7 days. People kept telling me how hard it must be for me. But all I could think of was how hard it must be on Syd. She was such a little trooper, and she had to face a lot of her fears, including blood draws, catheterization, horrible medication. But she made it through, and she is recovering well today.

Share a story of a daily happening.
I would say my work and sleep schedule are pretty unusual. I wake up at 2:30am to be at work by 3:30am. Our morning show is on the air from 4:30am to 7am. By 7:30am I am eating a full lunch. I anchor an 11am show then I’m off by noon. Meanwhile, my husband is taking Sydney to preschool then heads to work as a medical device sales rep and my nanny is watching the baby. Once I get home, I eat another lunch, then the nanny leaves by 1pm. If I’m lucky, both kids will nap from 2-4pm. If I’m extra tired, I will nap too. I literally go into a coma. If I’m feeling ambitious, I will work on my blog, read a book or magazine, catch up on my shows on the DVR, or get in a yoga/pilates DVD workout. Then once the three of us get up, the kids play or watch cartoons while I cook dinner. Usually my husband is home by then and we can all sit down for a family meal. Then there’s Sydney’s dance class some nights or bible study or gym. It’s an inexact science, but we have a somewhat regular schedule. Then the kids and I have essentially the same bedtime: 8:30pm.

What are some places you love taking your kids?
Fresno has some great little kid-friendly spots around town. During the summer we have a mini water park right at our neighborhood park, they also love the Chaffee Zoo and Rotary Playland, which is a small amusement park. My daughter asks to go to Chuck E Cheese every now and then, but I avoid it on the weekends like the plague. Believe it or not Syd also LOVES going to the gym with me because the daycare has an awesome play area. For a weekly treat, the kids LOVE frozen yogurt. It’s always the same: strawberry or tart yogurt, with mochi, strawberries and fruity pebbles. But our absolute favorite place to go as a family is Disneyland. We go about three times a year. This year, we splurged and took a family vacation to Disney World. It was a lot of work, but totally amazing.

What are your hopes and desires for your children?
I hope my children turn out to be better than I could raise them on my own, meaning, I leave a lot up to God. I would be proud if they respected their culture, their elders, had a strong faith and principles, found spouses they loved, and pursued lives and careers that gave them joy and satisfaction. My parents raised me that way. All three of us kids have unconventional careers – I’m a TV journalist, my brother worked for the Secret Service and now NASA, and my sister is a graphic design artist. Not a doctor or lawyer among us!

Tell us more about your career and what you've been doing these days.
My husband asked me the other day, “Do you ever wake up and dread going to work?” I told him, “Honestly, no.” He said, “You’re lucky.” And he’s right. I love what I do, and I consider it a privilege. I get to tell people’s stories for a living. I’ve been on the front lines of devastating wildfires, I’ve been on board an aircraft carrier returning from Iraq, I’ve recovered thousands of lost wedding pictures from photographers who cheated their clients. There are few jobs, I feel, that can have such an impact. That said, being in the news business is not easy. It is not usually family friendly, and you really have to work your way up from the bottom. I’ve worked every holiday, nights, weekends, you name it. I’ve ripped scripts, gotten coffee, broken my ankle, been cursed at, peed in bushes in the middle of nowhere, been ankle deep in cow manure. It’s not always glamorous, but it’s a heck of a ride. Every day is different.

 
What is your favorite part about being a reporter?
Access. People will let you into their lives and places where normal people couldn’t go. For example, I rode in the cockpit with the Blue Angels. I don’t know anyone else who’s been in a fighter jet going 7G’s. (I totally passed out, by the way, and it’s all on tape) I’ve interviewed celebrities, and average people with extraordinary stories. Something so private, or painful, or amazing, they open themselves up to you.

 

 

What are some of the perks when working in your field?
People will bend over backward to help you out when they know who you are. This applies both to work and my personal life. Appointments, reservations, concert tickets, you name it. But you can’t abuse it. You have to approach it with appreciation and humility, knowing these people are your viewers, your fans, and they are going out of their way to help you. I also love being approached by viewers when I’m out and about. The feedback is almost always positive and it reaffirms what we do every single morning at the crack of dawn. Fresno has an unusually loyal, avid TV audience. They tell me they feel like they know me, and it motivates me to keep doing what I do. But it also means I can’t ever leave the house without makeup! LOL

What is your favorite Korean food?
Naeng-myun and galbi. Bibimbap. Soon Tofu. I could eat those things every single day.

What is your favorite Movie? Color? Restaurant?
Favorite Movie: Love Actually
Color: Fuschia
Restaurant: Ruth’s Chris. Can’t go wrong with a piece of meat sizzling on a plate of butter.

What is your favorite Korean Drama?
Korean dramas are an addiction I gave up in college.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
In 10 years, I will be 43, my kids will be teenagers (Lord! Help me!). I see myself as a part-time news anchor, part-time journalism instructor, and part-time blogger and internet based journalist. I taught broadcast writing for several semesters at Fresno State after I got my master’s there, and I loved it. My instructors in college were more academic-based, and I feel like students really benefit from professors who actually have practical, day-to-day experience in the field. That said, I really feel like the future of journalism is going to be on the web, not television. Or more like a fusion of both, like Google TV. I’m trying to figure out how to tap into that, where people will get their news and information on demand. I started www.tvnewsmom.blogspot.com as a way to keep my friends up-to-date on stuff that affects us specifically as moms. A lot of information I want to pass on never makes it on the air. We simply don’t have the time. But the blog and Facebook are a great way to do that.

Thanks so much for sharing your story with us Christine! We wish you tons of success in your carreer and much blessings for your family!

 

Where To Toy Shop This Holiday Season?

Written By: Jeanie Chang

Wal-Mart and Target!

According to the Wall Street Journal, Wal-Mart and Target are battling it out to win the dollars of toy-buying parents.  So, if you plan on venturing out in the wee hours on Black Friday to buy toys for your kids, I suggest you hit Wal-Mart and Target first before going to other stores like Toys R 'Us.  The Wall Street Journal says until recently Wal-Mart had priced its toys higher than those advertised by Target, but now Wal-Mart's new toys beat Target's prices by just a few pennies.  Maybe that's not enough to make a difference for you especially if you favor one store over the other.  I personally prefer Target because the customer service is so much better and their aisles are more organized.

But if you're looking for specific toys in particular this season such as a Barbie doll embedded with a video camera for your daughter, it is $39 at Wal-Mart or $6 less than Target.  According to the Wall Street Journal, Target priced Stinky the Garbage Truck, a matchbox truck that tells jokes, at $49.99 after a coupon or $6 less than Wal-Mart.   I would do your research before Black Friday on where to get the best deal on the specific toys you want to purchase for your children!

Here's another good thing about shopping at Wal-Mart and Target this year, both retailers say if you show them an ad featuring a lower price, they will match it!  You can't beat that -  plus it saves you so much time and energy shopping from store to store if you just choose these two to tackle this year for your toy shopping!

The Wall Street Journal does say that Target may have an edge this holiday season because shoppers get an extra 5% discount on all purchases including toys if they pay with a Target credit or debit card or the Target visa card.  If you have one of those, then Target should be your main destination.

Check out the article online at www.msnbc.com.

TARGET COUPONS up to 50% off Christmas Toys and More! Click Here!

Good Cop Versus Bad Cop!

 Written By: Jeanie Chang

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My 8 year old son recently asked me why daddy couldn't stay home and I go to work?  I asked him why did he want daddy to stay home?  His answer was "I miss daddy all the time and don't see him much.  Also, he's more fun than you."   I was offended, to say the least.  Hello, where's the love?  I can be fun sometimes when I'm not disciplining or cooking or cleaning or doing laundry or helping with homework or telling the kids to practice piano.  After I do all that, I CAN BE FUN!

Let's face it.  In my family, I am indeed seen as the BAD COP.  I do most of the disciplining.  Not because my husband isn't good at it, but because I'm with the kids most of the time.  In the evenings, when the need arises my husband does step up and discipline the kids and he does it well.  We are on the same page when it comes to how we parent our children and we always show unity in front of the kids.  This is very important.  But for some reason, the kids don't seem to get as upset with their daddy.  I even overheard my six year old tell my husband the other day quote, "It's mommy's turn to go to work now.  When are you going to stop working?"  My husband told him that he needed to go make money so they could have food and clothes, etc.   My three year old must have been in on the conversation because he told his preschool teacher the other day that "daddy has to go to work and make moneys.  Mommy just stays home and cooks and cleans."   My son's teacher was laughing as she was telling me this.  It sounds like even my baby thinks daddy is all that.

Between my husband and I, it's clear who is more Type A.  You guessed it.  I run a very tight ship in my house.   Bedtime is strictly observed and dinner is always around 6 pm.  Homework is done first, then piano and violin practicing.  When there's some spare time, then it's reading to tackle.  No Wii, no DS, no playtime really during the week.  If I give them an inch, they take a MILE.  So, no distractions or screens during the week at all.

When I have PTA meetings or evening commitments to attend, my husband is in charge and if the kids finish all their work and music practices and there's some spare time - he does let them have a little fun so my kids just remember that and he's their hero for life!

Mommies, are you the bad cop too?   Or is daddy the bad cop?  Do you and your husband have differences when it comes to parenting or disciplining your children?  Some parental experts say they have issues with the whole "cop" thing.  They say that parents don't need to be cops.  They need to be coaches and teachers for their children.  I couldn't agree more, but I use the term "cop" loosely - more as a metaphor.

Do you remember being young and asking your mom if you could do something and if the answer wasn't what you wanted, you went and then proceeded to ask your dad the same question to see if he would answer in your favor?  I definitely remember doing that.  I would actually ask my dad first because he was the disciplinarian in my family, then I'd ask my mom to see if I could get a different answer.  She always said, "What did your dad say?"

I thought it was so funny when my daughter asked my husband if she could stay up late an extra hour and my husband told her "no" which seemed to surprise her.  Then, she came over to me (not knowing I overheard) and asked the same question.  I said, "What did daddy say?"  LOL.

If you're a SAHM (stay-at-home-mom), it does make sense for you to be the primary disciplinarian and maybe labeled the "bad cop."  As I said before, I agree parents should be coaches and teachers not so much "cops", but one of us has to make sure there's discipline and follow the rules, right?